Wednesday, November 11, 2009

hindi best jokes ever

Munna bhai: Agar bina danto ka kutta kate to kya karna chahiye?
Circuit: Simple bhai... Bina sui ka injection lagane ka!



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Narad Muni dharti par madira peene aaye,12 botal pilane k baad
Theke wala: Apko chadhti kyun nahi ?

Narad: Main Bhagwaan Hoon.
Theke wala: Ab Chad gayi bevde ko.



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Jija: Sali ji, aapke yahan ki sabse mash-hoor cheez kaunsi hai?
Sali: Jija ji, jo mash-hoor thi, usey to aap le gaye!



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Q: Agar do pipal ke Pedon ko ek rassi se bandh diya jaye to us rassi ko kya kahenge?
A: Us rassi ko bolengey NOKIA - Connecting pipal.



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Kuri waley Munde nu: Tusi nonveg khandey ho?
Munda: Haan

Sharaab?
Haan

Drugs?
Haan

Jua?
Haan

Sab kuch negative hai, kuch positive ve hai?
Munda: Haanji, HIV+



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Gal: Is dress ka kya price hai?
Shopkeeper: Sirf 5 kiss.

Girl: Aur us dress ka?
Shopkeeper: 10 kiss.

Girl: Dono dress pack kar do, bill dadi dengi.



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Sachin's Daughter: Yeh Kya, Daddy Sixer pe Sixer maare jaa rahe hain Hain?
Sachin's Wife: Arey beta, yeh toh ADVERTISEMENT Hai !



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Ab tak meri life ek khuli botal thi,
jis mein se sab perfume ki tarah ud jata tha.

Par aap ke aane se sab kuch ruk gaya,
Bhagwan kare aap jaisa DHAKKAN sabko miley.



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Santa: Tommy ne meri saari kitaab kha layi

Mother: Ohnu mere kole leke aa mein usnu saja dewan

Santa: Saja ta mein de diti, usdi kauli wala dudh mein pee gaya



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Manmohan Singh: We are sending Indians to the moon next year!

Bush: Wow! Howc many?

Manamohan: 25 OBC, 25 SC, 20 ST, 5 Handicapped, 5 Sports Persons, 5 Terrorist Affected, 5 Kashmiri Migrants, 9 Politicians & if possible 1 Astronnaut



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1980 girls: Maan mei Jeans pehanungi
Maan : Nahin beti log kya kahengey?

2006 girls: Maan mein mini skirt pehanungi
Maan: Pehen le beti kuch to pehan le!



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Lamha Lamha Waqt Guzar Jayega,
Chand Lamhon Men Exam Sar Pe Ajayega,

Abhi Bhi Waqt Hai Do Line Padh Lo,
Warna Paas Kia Munna Bhai Karwae Ga?



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Generation Next Motto: Na hum shaadi karenge, na apne bachchon ko karne denge.



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Mallika went to a swimming pool in a BRA & PANTY.

Guard: Madam here 2 piece costume is not allowed!

Mallika: Kaun sa utaroon?



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Basanti: Bhaag Dhanno bhag, aaj teri Basanti ki izzat ka sawal hai.

Dhanno: Tujhe apni padi hai. Meri soch jiske peeche Gabbar ke 10 ghode pade hain

7 comments:

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chirag malhotra said...

these jokes are too good...

Anonymous said...

it's really very nice jokes and funny too