Sunday, May 17, 2009

best women jokes

Police arrestd a drunkard & askd: Where r u goin?

Man: I'm goin 2 listen lecture on ill effcts of drinking.Cop: Who'll lecture at midnite?Man: My wife...

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Law Professor: Which is the most important LAW of Finance for Starting a New Business?Student: Father-in-Law!


Man: Is there any way for long life?

Dr: Get married.Man: Will it help?

Dr: No, but the thought of long life will never come.


What's the biggest pressure for Pak captain when Pak needs 1 run to win in 8 over’s, with 5 wickets in hand?Ya Allah! How to speak English in presentation ceremony?

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Beggar: Saab 12Rs do na coffee peeni hai.Man: Lekin coffee to 6Rs ki hai?Beggar: Par saab girlfrend bhi to hai.Man: Bhikari hokar bhi GF banali.Beggar: Na saab,GF ne Bhikari bana diya!--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Q: Why do women live longer than men?

A: Shopping never causes heart attacks, but paying the bill does!


Wats the diff between Complete & Finished?

If you find good wife u r complete otherwise u r finished.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------So many options: Poison, sleeping pills, hanging, jumping from a building, lying on train tracks, but we chose Marriage, slow but sure!

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Have u heard about the man who threw his wife into a pond of crocodiles? He's now being harassed by the animal rights for being cruel to the crocodiles.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Two men r talking. 1st: I got married coz I was tired of eating out, cleaning the house, doing the laundry & wearing shabby clothes.

2nd: Amazing, I just got divorced for the very same reasons

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Wife: If I dismiss the cook and make the food myself for a month, what will you pay me?Husband: I won't have to pay you, you'll get my entire insurance amount.