Saturday, June 20, 2009

Guide to Remove Bra

OBJECTIVE:
To disengage said bra without looking like an idiot.

WHAT YOU NEED:

1) Girl with bra
2) Two functional hands
3) Common Sense

TECHNIQUES

1) THE HOUDINI HUG -- Using sleight-of-hand, place arms around girl and unhook bra. Try to refrain from saying, "Ta-da!"

2) MCGYVER'S OFF-THE-SHOULDER SLIDE -- An alternative method to use after ten minutes of unsuccessful hugging.

3) HILTON'S LAST RESORT -- Beg like a dog and learn to absorb the harsh sound of wicked laughter.

DO NOT USE: scissors, blowtorch, pliers, wire strippers, cutlery, Black Magic, staple remover, chainsaw, brute strength, CB4, set of lock picks, or chisel and hammer.

WARNING: When removing a bra you should not say the following:
1) "I really want to thank you for this."
2) "Dammit! I thought they were bigger."
3) "Do you have any cereal?"""""""""

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Ouch....

A man had been in a terrible car accident, and woke up in the hospital. Looking around, he noticed a doctor leaning over his bed. "...